There have been many times in the last 10 months when I heard my Truth tell me to love myself first and foremost and I still remember the day in March last year when I heard it being said in this way for the first time.
It was one of those darker days, I didn’t feel great, there had been many questions running through my head for some time and I knew that I had to sit down and start writing. I made sure I was on my own and wouldn’t be disturbed, closed my eyes for a moment, connected to my Truth and began writing, first as me but then soon the Truth took over. I love when that happens. The closer I get to Source, the quicker the process is. There were some things that I needed to hear about me and my purpose and that’s also when I first heard these important words “Love yourself always first and foremost. Only good can come out of love. Always remember that. Follow love, follow the path of least resistance, of most allowing. Love, enjoy. We love you so much. You are such an amazing being. Know it, feel it, become it. Become one with the love that you are. Remind yourself of your Truth all the time. Change your vibration. We are with you always and will always guide you and assist you...”.
It took me many long years to truly understand, remember, feel and be ok with the fact that unconditional love wasn’t some kind of outside force separate from me, that not only it was in me, but that it was one with me.
Unconditional love is the real me, what I have always been and what I will always be.
When years ago I finally started hearing the voice of Truth loud and clear, I was ecstatic. However, I have discovered time and time again that I often forget what I am being told. That’s why the process of writing it all down is so important. Once it is on a page, I can go back to it and really take it in.
When a journal was introduced during last month’s Dr Joe Dispenza’s 10 day retreat, I have to admit that I didn’t use it at all for the first few days. I do not like writing things down during lectures, I just love to take it all in, to be present as much as I can. When I did start writing, it was my thoughts, experiences and downloads that I received during meditations and coherence healings that I put on paper. I also used the second part of the journal whenever I felt that the Truth wanted to tell me something that needed to be written down.
It is definitely easier said than done to love yourself and it doesn’t happen in a day. It took me many years to overcome myself, my anger, anxiety, guilt, blame and all the limiting beliefs of which the most prominent was ‘I am not good enough’. There will never be a time when I will completely get it done as there will always be more love to feel, discover and become. There are obviously times when I still react, when I forget, but the more I remember the Truth, the quicker it takes me to go back to love.
Truly falling in love with yourself is one of the most difficult and at the same time the most rewarding and life-changing things that we can do. It was some months ago when I realised that instead of the usual feelings of guilt, judgment, fear and blame, there was true love for myself that I felt. I was ecstatic. Whenever I had unwanted thoughts, during a meditation or with my eyes open, whenever I made a mistake, said or done something I shouldn’t have, instead of the normal judgmental thoughts that would create guilt, shame and frustration and in turn produce even more unwanted thoughts and feelings, I felt love, understanding and care for myself. That really felt wonderful and the love I felt for myself put an instant stop to any ego thoughts. The real love and appreciation for myself was especially evident at Dr Joe’s 10 day retreat. In the first few days I started coughing, which was especially annoying during meditations. You can imagine 2,200 people doing their best to connect to Source and then you start coughing and can’t stop it. My ego had a blast trying to convince me that I should leave the room, that I was spoiling the meditation for everybody, that it was very selfish of me to stay and cough and annoy others and so on and so forth. Once you leave the ballroom during the meditation, you can’t go back. Being at this retreat was important for me, for my growth, for the future I was creating and I had to really remember who I was, why I was there and that the voice I was hearing was that of my ego trying its best for me to give up on myself. At first I started feeling guilty about spoiling the meditation for everybody in the room, but then I remembered what was important, why I was there and who I truly was, I went into my heart, felt an immense love for myself, appreciation for not giving up on myself, for my perseverance and effort and every time I loved myself, not only did the cough stop, but the love that I felt for myself was magnified. I was in a state of bliss every time I chose myself. I realised that Source appreciated my efforts, applauded me for my commitment, for choosing to be love and to stay in love and joined me in my love for me, making the experience profoundly intense and beautiful. Whenever you choose yourself, your efforts are noticed and your love multiplied. Source loves and appreciates you always and when you choose to love yourself, you connect on a deep level to who you really are, your Truth rejoices and joins you in total love.
How did I come to love myself? There is no magic in it really, I am not different than anybody else. I am simply not prepared to give up on myself, on being the person who I truly am, on constantly becoming a better version of myself, on love, on my dreams, on living my life with passion, in truth, love, joy and freedom. Source knows when you are sincere, when you truly want to make a difference, when you want to fall in love with yourself and your life. You are never on you own, you are always loved, supported and guided. For me being more loving and kind, loving myself, my life and seeing love in everybody and everything had been a priority for a long time. I really wanted to love myself unconditionally the way that the Truth always loves me and only recently I realised how all of a sudden I started feeling so much love for myself. I was a healee in August last year with Dr Joe’s authorised coherence healing group and loving myself and my life was a part of my intention. It was my first time being healed and it was a truly incredible, intense and unforgettable experience. I was sincere, I opened my heart, trusted, felt worthy and felt such immense love that it was hard to breathe. Since then, I have been so much more loving and understanding towards myself, which is especially evident at times when I make a mistake or have unwanted thoughts, which in the past would cause feelings of guilt and frustration. Never underestimate the power of your intention and the power of your heart. You are far more powerful than you imagine.
Loving myself is obviously something that I constantly have to work on. I can’t just think that I have achieved it and do nothing. The opposite is true. The more we evolve, the greater the challenges there will be. However, the more love that we become, the more we see these challenges as opportunities for growth. Loving myself and my life makes me a better, kinder, more loving and caring person. This is something I want to keep evolving and constantly becoming more of the love that all of us truly are.
Someone very dear to me told me recently to stay in my heart, to be confident, free and stand firm in my convictions. That’s exactly what I intend to do. Nobody knows me, my heart, my path and purpose better than my Truth. That doesn’t mean that I should disregard other people’s opinions and suggestions. It simply means being true to who I really am and following my heart, trusting and listening to my Truth that always guides me in the best way and loves me unconditionally.
Please remember that this is your life and not somebody else’s. It is not about other people’s expectations of who you should be, what you should do and how you should feel. It is about what you truly want, about taking your power back and deciding for yourself what kind of a person you want to be in every moment of your life. There will be times when you will succeed and others when you will react, when your thoughts, feelings and actions will be far from loving, but it is always in your power to choose to feel love for yourself instead of guilt, anger, judgment, frustration or disappointment. It always comes down to choice. Your choice. You always have a choice even when you decide that you don’t.
Loving yourself is a choice. What choice will you make? 💜
Add comment
Comments